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Thread: Should we give properties to our children?

  1. #1
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    Default Should we give properties to our children?

    https://propertysoul.com/2016/08/11/...-our-children/

    Should we give properties to our children?


    August 11, 2016

    Time flies. My younger girl just turned five today.

    Still remember my old blog post “A letter to my new born baby“? I thought I just wrote that yesterday?

    Five years on, when her little hand reaches for mine; when she holds me tight and plants a big kiss on my lips; when she looks me in the eyes and says ‘Mommy I love you’, I realize I must have done something really right in my last life.

    Wherever I travel, I buy her stickers printed with her favorite cartoon characters. We often review our proud collection together, recalling when, where and how much we got them.

    With fellow property investors, we review a different collection – our portfolio of properties acquired over the years – recalling when, where and how much we got them.

    Sometimes we talk about buying properties for our children. One would have bought a bachelor pad for the son. Another plans to set aside two houses for each of the two kids. Some are waiting for the lifting of Additional Buyer Stamp Duty to buy something suitable. A few are saving for the deposit.

    When I ask people why we have to help our kids to buy properties, the three most common reasons are:

    1. Property prices have climbed faster than inflation. Their children might not be able to afford one in the future.

    2. We love our kids and give them only the best, including food, clothes, housing and education. Why not properties?

    3. When we pass on one day, it’s good to leave something behind so that they will remember us.

    If we can afford, why not?

    For me, I am hesitant to give any property to my children for three simple reasons:

    1. Hopefully they inherit that property investment gene from me. If not, so be it.

    2. We can lead a happy life even without having the very best. Things we treasure most almost always have nothing to do with money.

    3. It is far more important to impart values and wisdom to the generation. What I want to leave behind is a legacy – not a physical property, but my vision and beliefs.

    I hope they remember me for who I am. Who cares about an old property? The one that has an outstanding loan and desperately need a major renovation?

    You might worry about not buying any property for your children even though you can afford it. If you die without leaving anything for them, they might blame you one day.

    But wait, by that time you have already died. So that’s not a problem anymore, isn’t it?

    In my book No B.S. Guide to Property Investment, I have touched on the legal implications for you and your children if you are buying properties for the next generation.

    One of my favorite Taiwanese writers Liu Yong (刘墉) has just published his latest book to share his advice for the elderly.

    He has been staying in the US for some time now. He says if you tell a lawyer that you want to put your property under your child’s name, the lawyer will ask you to add one special clause – you no longer own the property but you always have the right to stay there.

    One day your child will get married. You have no guarantee that you can get along with your son or daughter-in-law. With that special clause, at least you won’t end up in an old folk’s home.

    Another advice: if you want to share your wealth with your children, do it early and timely. Our life expectancy is getting longer. By the time we pass on, our next generation are most likely in their 60s. They no longer need that wealth in their retirement years. But they wish they had that when they were struggling to pay bills while supporting a young family.

    Another dilemma: You tell your children to study hard, get a good job and they will be able to enjoy what they have later in life. Don’t be surprised that they will ask you why. If you have already bought them a nice place to ensure that they will have a good life, why do they need to study hard and get a job?

    Lastly, you might want to take some hints from the book The Millionaire Next Door to understand how the millionaires manage to raise successful adult children.

    1. Never tell children that their parents are wealthy.

    2. No matter how wealthy you are, teach your children discipline and frugality.

    3. Assure that your children won’t realize you’re affluent until after they have established a mature, disciplined, and adult lifestyle and profession.

    4. Minimize discussions of the items that each child and grandchild will inherit or receive as gifts.

    5. Never give cash or other significant gifts to your adult children as part of a negotiation strategy.

    6. Stay out of your adult children’s family matters.

    7. Don’t try to compete with your children.

    8. Always remember that your children are individuals.

    9. Emphasize your children’s achievements, no matter how small, not their or your symbols of success.

    10. Tell your children that there are a lot of things more valuable than money.

    Really, you don’t have to leave your children a legacy. They are your legacy!

  2. #2
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    Interesting topic. No doubt buying for children is the major reason to buy property. It works well in the past as a means to improve next generation family wealth.

    However the writer attempt to mix property investment with good parenting is confusing. One has nothing to do with the other. You can be a good property investor and a good parent. Or you can be a bad property investor and a bad parent.

    Good parents has nothing to worry if they will pass many properties or nothing at all.

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    I learn what my father do and I tell myself never follow his foot step.

    Good parents, Bad parents it all depend on who the child is.

    I am a bad father, always show my son how to work less and get pay more.

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    I wish for my children to have the choice to do what they wish to do in the future without being restricted to jobs that people are willing to pay for, and without worrying about the living costs of their adding parents. Follow their dreams.
    The three laws of Kelonguni:

    Where there is kelong, there is guni.
    No kelong no guni.
    More kelong = more guni.

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    If you have properties of course give them to your children when one passed on , the problem most facing now are to buy ( investment properties) now or still wait if you have MTB.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Citizen View Post
    If you have properties of course give them to your children when one passed on , the problem most facing now are to buy ( investment properties) now or still wait if you have MTB.
    Still wait? Now can buy, provided can clear the cooling measure hurdles.

  7. #7
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    teddybear is offline Global recession is coming....
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    Buy only if the price has dropped like 20% from the peaks.....
    Think most CCR private properties fit into this category (and possibly none in OCR since they are still within 5% of historical peak).......

    Quote Originally Posted by august View Post
    Still wait? Now can buy, provided can clear the cooling measure hurdles.

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    If buy only based on peak, Sentosa is the best choice.

    Quote Originally Posted by teddybear View Post
    Buy only if the price has dropped like 20% from the peaks.....
    Think most CCR private properties fit into this category (and possibly none in OCR since they are still within 5% of historical peak).......
    The three laws of Kelonguni:

    Where there is kelong, there is guni.
    No kelong no guni.
    More kelong = more guni.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kelonguni View Post
    If buy only based on peak, Sentosa is the best choice.
    Haha Kelonguni... True true provided one has deep pockets with no affordability issue.

    I enjoy all the perspectives from all the gurus here. The repartee is indeed enlightening! Thank You

    I read what Teddybear says with additional unspoken qualifiers...
    "Buy only if the price has dropped like 20% from the peaks........ in your targeted area of interest and if one is not limited by tdsr-restricted budget and loan... and the drop need not be 20% too... can be any figure depending on one's risk appetite and urgency to purchase."

    cheers

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    Maybe help younger generation to make down payment? So they have some motivations to work? (Paying off the mortgage).

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    a topic which i repeatedly thought over lately. few mths back, my old parents just did a will to distribute the shares of selling their 4-room HDB to their children/grandson (traditional thinking that son + grandson should get the biggest share) if the situation when they passed on. i respect their decision, but at the same time, i told them why not just downgrade the HDB and get some cash to enjoy, rather than saving for us? Not as though we can keep the house for hundreds of years and pass down... My elder sis and bro were both married with their own house, i'm the last one standing - living with them, paying off the housing and some of the expenses. my siblings are not good in saving up money (as in left hand in, right hand out same applies to my parent), thus they dont take money home (even when they were single) and also why my parents (72 and 67) still need to work for their daily expenses. and because of this incident, makes me wonder, why i am still living with parents, when i have the ability to live alone (and better managing my own finance). I went to purchase a 1-bedded condo unit (as i have not reached 35). To me is, they think they left something for us, but to me is just money which just spend and forget. what should left behind is the teaching, care, concern and all the small things we did together. No point leaving behind the flat to children, when parents did not spend quality time with the children, never really do any life teaching etc. To me, i will not appreciate. not that is not good, but they need to think of themselves, as in, they should lead their own lives to the fullest.

    and we will have a road to go, parents can only accompany half way, cannot always spoon feed (which i see my bro as the best example of a resultant of spoon feeding, and now he expect his baby sister - me to continue spoon feed him). we should work hard and reap what we sow.

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    There are a thousand ways to earn money. More important is to cultivate the dreams and the hunger.

    If my parents left me a million, I will be even hungrier to multiply it even more.


    Quote Originally Posted by leafe View Post
    a topic which i repeatedly thought over lately. few mths back, my old parents just did a will to distribute the shares of selling their 4-room HDB to their children/grandson (traditional thinking that son + grandson should get the biggest share) if the situation when they passed on. i respect their decision, but at the same time, i told them why not just downgrade the HDB and get some cash to enjoy, rather than saving for us? Not as though we can keep the house for hundreds of years and pass down... My elder sis and bro were both married with their own house, i'm the last one standing - living with them, paying off the housing and some of the expenses. my siblings are not good in saving up money (as in left hand in, right hand out same applies to my parent), thus they dont take money home (even when they were single) and also why my parents (72 and 67) still need to work for their daily expenses. and because of this incident, makes me wonder, why i am still living with parents, when i have the ability to live alone (and better managing my own finance). I went to purchase a 1-bedded condo unit (as i have not reached 35). To me is, they think they left something for us, but to me is just money which just spend and forget. what should left behind is the teaching, care, concern and all the small things we did together. No point leaving behind the flat to children, when parents did not spend quality time with the children, never really do any life teaching etc. To me, i will not appreciate. not that is not good, but they need to think of themselves, as in, they should lead their own lives to the fullest.

    and we will have a road to go, parents can only accompany half way, cannot always spoon feed (which i see my bro as the best example of a resultant of spoon feeding, and now he expect his baby sister - me to continue spoon feed him). we should work hard and reap what we sow.
    The three laws of Kelonguni:

    Where there is kelong, there is guni.
    No kelong no guni.
    More kelong = more guni.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kelonguni View Post
    There are a thousand ways to earn money. More important is to cultivate the dreams and the hunger.

    If my parents left me a million, I will be even hungrier to multiply it even more.
    hungrier to multiply more through hard work of cos good, but not just using mouth to ask for more. i think still back the fundamental teaching of the parents and the characteristics of the child.

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    Quote Originally Posted by leafe View Post
    hungrier to multiply more through hard work of cos good, but not just using mouth to ask for more. i think still back the fundamental teaching of the parents and the characteristics of the child.
    Teaching the kid is important for sure. As parents, we must try.... The question is - how is parenting taught???? Parenting is primarily taught by looking at how our parents brought us up..... Another is by reading up.... The older generation had minimal education and only knew parenting by their parents.

    Secondly, no children are alike...... Some will embrace the values given by the parents, some will not. So it is not a guaranteed outcome.... That's why you see some will be more filial then others.


    Question, why do we want our children to have education???? So they can get a job and survive????? Why don't the parents teach financial/investment education??? Because the parents themselves are not equipped with it. So somewhere along the way, the chain can only be broken if the child learns about financial investment.

    Why do parents get kids to go so many tuition, enrichment classes, etc.... To give the kid a heads up against their peer (or to be on par). How many kids who do not have such classes excel in school vs those who have????

    If giving the kid some inheritance give them a heads up, what's wrong???? And at the same time, imparting investment skills to the kids....

    In life, there is no guarantee.... Just do your best and let nature take its course.

    No point reflecting on what others should do.... See, observe and see if you want to adopt the same route or avoid it. Most important is, what are you doing for yourself to improve your life.

    If having a HDB is good enough and you are happy, it's good. If you want more money, learn how to get it.

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